Fingerprints

Saturday, April 11, 2009

You know how on crime shows, if the detectives find a fingerprint, everything is pretty much smooth sailing from there? Because they can just put the fingerprint in their computer and it comes up with a match. And then they have their suspect.

I've never been fingerprinted in my life. Never had any reason to.

So I always thought that if I were ever to commit a crime, I pretty much had a free pass. I could leave fingerprints over everything at the crime scene. It wouldn't matter. There wouldn't be a computer in the whole world that could match it to anything.


(This is off course assuming that everything else went well. Like no witnesses, video cameras, photographs, etc, etc. Of course. And that I would conjure images of Katherine Zeta Jones in Entrapment.)


Well, it looks like my days of getting off scott free are over.

Part of my physician licensing paperwork is going down to the sheriff's office and having a complete set of fingerprints taken and entered into the FBI database. This is all part of my criminal background check. To make sure that they are letting psychopaths become licensed physicians.

And apparently keep future criminal activity in check as well.

So there go my dreams of the perfect diamond heist.